Another Letter Better Left Unsent...

It's not like I didn't like you back when you seemed to like me. You had a girlfriend. What could I have done?

Then you dumped her, and raved about how great it was to be single. Wasn't about to do anything there either.

And then there was the girl at the party, the random makeout session that you told me about later that night. Ouch.

And then you just didn't seem to care.

Et cetera, et cetera...

And now you keep me guessing. You either think of me of such a close friend, a buddy, that you can share all these snippets of information with me, or you think you're dropping hints with "I want a girlfriend". But a hint isn't enough anyway.

I just wish I would know, whatever that would mean. If you're over me, hey, I'll hate myself for not helping you cheat on your ex, but I'll move on eventually. If you're not, why is it so hard to just say that? But as always I don't want to say anything I'll regret, so I don't take sides between you and me, and I pretend I'm oblivious, and - this is a new trick, too - I give you advice about other girls you seem to like. What a smart girl I am. "You're not sure if he likes you, so give him tips on how to get away from you as soon as possible. That will really win him over."

In short, I'm scared to scare you away, but I'm afraid I may have already done just that. I don't know where you stand because I don't see you nearly enough for that sort of thing.

I just read this over and it's laughable, I know what I need to do and I avoid doing it just because I'm a chickenshit. I cover it up with excuses, but you're a man, I'm sure it's not going to hurt you any to have a girl chasing after you.

So I'm gonna do it. It's not going to kill me, right?

Yours,
Manda